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There is, I believe, no more brutal humor on Earth, than bonafide Native American humor, and although this humor’s frequent darkness may be related to recent history (past few centuries), there’s really something else about the universal (across the tribes) trickster (god, with a small g) that is fundamentally opposed to the western or modern (to the Americas) mentality. One might consider the ‘taciturn’ Indian maybe doesn’t talk to the Whites (or their close kin, the ‘Black-Whiteman’) in the terms you see here (or talk much in the presence of Whites at all), it’s either because 1) they’re too polite to say what they actually think and/or 2) They know, more likely than not, in any case it’d be a wasted effort. In this 2nd case, I have to apologize to Mr Barking Dog (see below) for violating Native etiquette and pointing out ‘stupid is as stupid does’ is the most apropos folk proverb to describe this phenomenal problem of cross-cultural non-communication; no, wait. It’s not stupid is as stupid does, it’s the dilemma of trying to explain a few simple things to ‘people too stupid to understand they’re stupid.’ Consequently, I fear for my legacy; having tried to do just that. But I might be saved by the Native rule of paradox, because someone with a little bit of humility, having actually read through this following essay’s insults, might actually get the fundamentally sound lesson in the Native humor… it’s not that I mean to give anyone a lifetime’s mental complex, but in our (Native) world there are no excuses, you have to sort through, you cannot conceal, your bulls**t.

Barking Dog: “Want to understand ! Can’t get there from here. Stuck in Caucasian thought, way of doing things. Can you direct me to an area of studies starting at square one so I can understand. Or would it be a useless effort like a dog chasing his tail. Thanks for your work and sharing the earth people’s way”

So, I got this preceding message from Barking Dog over at James LaFond’s site where he [James] is kind enough to run my articles and books (chapter by chapter.) Well, I’ve tried, again and again [1], [2], [3], [4] [5] to bring the understanding across over a period of more than 30 years, without much success. So, here’s trying again:

The Time I Fondled a Dog’s Nuts

These (pre-Cartesian-Platonic) indigenous people were patient in a sense nearly unknown today. My own understanding of, and sight in that world, derives from freak circumstance (or destiny determined by the gods) I wouldn’t wish on anyone, the death of the western idea-forms ‘didn’t happen easily’ (perhaps the greatest understatement of my life, to now.) But here is trying one more time, to bring the working philosophy across.

The first thing to look at is, is the contrast between one of the great (and perhaps only universal) ‘gods’ of the Native world(s), that is ‘the trickster’, and the construct of the mentality according to western psychology. These are mutually exclusive approach to life; the western way is all about process shaping the ego as an adaptive tool engaging one’s surroundings, the Native way had been to pre-empt the emergence of ego in any form, and this had been the role of the trickster, who could quite accurately be described as the ego destroyer; in culture where ego had been diagnosed and treated as an anti-social mental disorder.

Culturally speaking, at the meta-level, never the twain shall meet. Here is example at the most base level; The western ‘inventiveness’ allows for ego-based individual pursuits independent of influence by surroundings, for instance a corporation is formed by an individual who applies for permits and begins dynamiting rock for cyanide heap leech mining operations. Because the Native mentality cannot perceive itself as detached from (or independent of) consciousness concerning the surrounding environment, this event would be perceived as criminally anti-social in a context the western science has only a small awareness or intellectual (not practical) grasp of:

“The doctrine that the world is made up of objects whose existence is independent of human consciousness turns out to be in conflict with quantum mechanics and with facts established by experiment” -Bernard d’Espagnat, Theoretical Physicist

Here it is demonstrated ‘Plato was wrong’ but in no way will that error halt his scientific ‘objectivity’ based ‘progress’, because western science cannot grasp the profound perceptual mistake made in the very [ego] self d’Espagnat is pointing to. In other words, the idea the human ‘self’, ego and associated, conscious self-awareness, is in any sense independent of our organic surroundings is just not true and this cannot be practically grasped or understood at the meta-level because it is a threat to the ego-self of the very culture. For that fact, it is beyond their comprehension.

This preceding versus

“The knowledge and use of any or all the powers of the objects on Earth around us is as liable to lead a man wrong as to lead him right. It is merely power, with no way of knowing how to use it correctly … unless Spirit is with a man’s spirit for the light” -Red Tomahawk, Sioux

What is Red Tomahawk’s spirit? It is the collective consciousness of our surroundings, including the awareness embodied in the rock being blown up for cyanide heap leach gold extraction. Each of those dynamite explosions is exploding part of a process of sentient, aware intelligence. Red Tomahawk has an ages old, functional grasp of something western science is beginning to glimpse but dare not know the implications.

It follows, the indigenous perception would be, with killing off of our surrounding intelligence, the Earth is, accordingly, becoming severely dumbed down. The analogy would be, with the increasing loss of intelligent expression, our planet is becoming, in a practical sense, a brain damaged spastic. It can’t even coordinate its weather anymore. And there is no escaping consequence, we all are a part of all of it.

Then, western perception is, the exploitation, or as Red Tomahawk put it “the knowledge and use of any or all the powers of the objects on Earth around us”, to a point of destroying our life-giving environment (surroundings) is ‘progress’ because building civilization in the process enables ‘intelligent’ demonstrations of what ultimately amounts to grandiose acts of ego: “We put men in space.”

Well, you can proceed to destroy the planet by building civilization to a point you can send a shipload of colonists to Mars (to certainly die there) and no doubt this will titillate the collective ego of that very civilization, but how intelligent is it to sacrifice the underlying support mechanism, that is life sustaining nature, in the process? How is it western mentality (and the civilization it rules) cannot grasp this single, simple equation in an applied, practical sense? Ego is, quite literally, a destructive thing.

To begin to grasp Native mentality, westerner’s would have to take a mortal hit to ego, that’s the first step, and accept at the core of one’s being, you are a member of a class that are the most aggressive, dumbest fuckers to grace this planet with bipedalism since T Rex went extinct 66 or so million years ago, only less intelligent. T Rex didn’t deliberately blow his world up, only western civilization would do that.

Insofar as IQ, what you are actually measuring is the western projection of ego, not true intelligence which more closely resembles common sense, bringing us to this next:

If you can wrap your head around the idea Plato has insured your culture has created a socialization machine that mass produces people who are worse than total idiots and that includes yourself, and accept this as fact and as the beginning premise of your new intelligence (resolve to climb out of Plato’s pit of ego-driven stupidity), there’s hope for you but not much more than that, because now you have start unfucking everything concerning yourself that’s fucked up in this life and it’s a lot of work. This work begins with breaking habits in your thinking.

Rule one: “I don’t know anything” because from the point of view of the new system you aspire to learn about, you really don’t know s**t. Like a friend had recently stated to me, “I expect we grasp the nature of reality about as well as my dog understands how my Mastercard works.” Bingo. Good start.

From this immediate preceding premise, we are all equal; because in the system you are learning, you cannot *know* the nature of reality. It is what it is, you’ll never know its source or origins, you cannot, that’s the point of its name: The Great Mystery. The difference here, between your old perception, and the new perception you aspire to learn is, you have no right to jack the expression of this mystery around, like so many scientists jacking-off with their experiments in the lab do, because this all has consequence and you have no right to bring consequence down on anyone except yourself. There IS a right to behave stupidly, but only in relation to yourself, not in relation to me, not in relation to your mom, and certainly not in relation to your neighbor or larger environment. This is for the fact your environment is part and parcel of our social world; when you fuck it up for yourself, you fuck it up for everyone. This is NOT allowed. Consequently, for the socially retarded newcomer to this system, we have to inform you in absolutely retarded terms, you possess no more right to exist than the stuff you’re used to chopping down, blowing up, or whatever it is you do to enjoy a life out of proportion to your personal importance, which is, by the way, nil, except that you are recognized as valuable by the expression of the mystery, in effect our sentient environment, inclusive of trees and stones. Certainly we are not talking about recognition in any sense of Alfred Nobel.

Yeah, trees and stones. Now here’s something to think about. Let’s say because you are of the old indigenous mental construction and you know *how* to pray *through* the trees, while traveling, you come to a Y in the road. To now, you only know there is a way through the forest you are traversing, but you have no map and no detailed instruction. Because you know *how* to pray *through* the trees, the environment (which is sentient, intelligent, and social) recognizes, respects, and even *anticipates* your thought when you send it out – “which way” – and a large bird of prey drops out of a tree and flies down right fork in the road, your questions are responsibly answered along this and other lines, with 100% accuracy, throughout the trip … because this indigenous mentality can repeat this *read* of the environment with fluency and confidence, whether it is a bird calls in the precise moment, or noticing a feature resembling a face in a rock outcropping (psychosis to the Platonic mentality), even a puff of breeze moving leaves on an otherwise still day and more. When you make a reprise of this journey (now knowing the road) but the forest has been slaughtered by logging for pulp mills to make paper, it is then a Native understands what is murderous stupidity.

It is this murderous stupidity that must be weeded from your thinking. The ideas you had taken for granted, must become ideas that you viscerally hate. In every possible small way, you must learn to learn it all over again, and in every small way you must learn to resist the insanity:

“Everyone knows the Whiteman is crazy” -Blackfoot proverb

With all of the preceding said, I’d tried teaching this system to both men and women of the White world, over a period of 30 years. The result? One male, and only one, was able to grasp a working knowledge of this system, and it took five years before it began to ‘click’ for him. On the other hand, several women were able to see and begin to grasp (demonstrate a functional understanding) in as little as one afternoon’s walk together in the forest. More typically, these women were a more unique and respectful lesbian mentality without the male sense of ego found in feminist western women in a western culture where women’s emancipation has determined women adopt the aggressive postures of the western male. This 2nd were example of women who couldn’t make the phenomenon happen. Amazon intelligence they are not.

The time I fondled a dog’s nuts goes to shocking the western ego as a matter of demonstration. A younger Native male, my relative, was a hot-shot fire crewman, the elite of the USA’s wild lands firefighters. His White colleague had heard my dog was actually a wolf and wanted to see this creature. This ‘dog’ could take off the arm of anyone that ‘smelled’ wrong and wanting to see it for simple ego sake was not the brightest thing.

In any case, here was this White guy, all young and tough, walking up to see my dog and could be in easily be in danger, depending on how the dog perceived him. Not wishing to introduce fear into the exchange of energy, and not wishing to be rude and say ‘stay away from the dog’, I defused the situation by asking the question “Do you know how to determine if your dog trusts you?” The young guys looked at me, I gave the proper cue, and my dog lay down on his back for me and I then held the dogs balls and rolled them together gently, like large dice, and looking up with straight face said “When your dog will let you do this” as my dog’s tongue was spilled out the side of his mouth to maximum length and the dog’s expression was nothing short of heavenly joy.

Saying nothing (the White kid was speechless, the Indian kid knowing how to keep a straight face), the young men walked away but later, my relative (I won’t give up his identity) told me, speaking of his colleague, “Man, it JARRED him when he saw that.” But you know what? Those times that young man will want to brag he’d seen, and been up close and personal with, a wolf, he’ll be confronted with memory of the wolf rolling on its back to have his nuts fondled and his White culture’s gynophobic male identity or suppressed narcissistic homosexuality (experienced as homophobia) and it’s associated macho ego will take a hit. And that’s pretty funny, especially considering he’d never come close to knowing why I’d done what I’d done, Native humor saving his life as it were.

Y’all had to fuck everything up

I was perusing the news and came across an article at Zero Hedge pointing to the proposed idea White men actually work more while on the job. Now, this raised some red flags in my satirical instinct, recalling those several occasions I’d witnessed White males with hard hats, standing around with hands in pockets; at federal highway construction projects, watching Blacks labor like slaves. This recalled Mel Brooks:

Now, maybe the social scientists at The Economist believe their statistics, and I have no problem with numbers per se, it’s how numbers are interpreted is what puts the hair up on this satirist animal’s back. It’s the small matter of cultural narcissism, also known as ethnocentric bias. It follows, applying what JRR Tolkien called ‘The Vulgar Tongue’ to simple social principles, we can  come up with alternative sight to what is actually going on.

  1. White men put more into the job during actual work hours because they are stakeholders in ‘the system’ or legacy of colonialism that is culturally White from historical perspective; in effect, they are better slaves because they ‘believe.’ Slaves!? some might ask? Sure, America was built on White indentured servitude, not only Black slavery, and the ‘belief’ was looking forward to that day of emancipation never offered to Blacks in a legal, contractual basis. Consequently, these days, White men are, by and large, the bigger suckers in a system that could give a rats ass about the color of your skin, so long as you are stupid enough to ‘buy in’ to a machine that will grind you throughout life and spit you out, not only more than tired, but broke and struggling to survive on social security. So, yes, the Whites are still the more hardworking slaves, despite their ’emancipation’ is demonstrated to be a lie.
  2. This immediate preceding brings up another cultural self-deceit, of Whites possessing the higher IQ. Again, it’s a matter of social interpretation of the numbers. The more you’re ‘bought in’ as a stake-holder, the higher your score is likely to be; due to socialization instilling work ethic, so, rather than ‘playing hookey’, that is, cutting school to do things that will make you HAPPY, you’re already slaving at the homework which will have the effect of raising your IQ score. In short, the sooner you surrender to the system, the earlier the age, and coming from the White heritage instilling the ‘work ethic’ (‘achievers’ most often come from families of ‘achievers’), the higher that’s going to jack up your IQ where IQ testing is designed measure your abilities as a slave in service to the system which owns you.
  3. This immediate preceding ‘work ethic’ is derived from a social phenomenon having little to do with happiness, as noted in H.L. Mencken’s maximum that Puritans (who brought the ‘work ethic’ to North America) must preoccupy themselves with the horrifying thought “Someone, somewhere, might be happy.” Not very intelligent that, irrespective of measurable IQ.
  4. Consequently, you have a society that is miserable in divers ways; and in the course of making other people’s lives miserable, they live out their own miserable lives.
  5. So these ‘hard working’ people learned to follow Jesus command to ‘love’ by ‘loving’ to hate. Because of the ‘love’ factor in ‘loving’ to hate themselves, their kids and their fellow man, making ‘love’ is more often a rape than not, ‘loving’ their brothers and sisters is ‘loving’ to tell other people how to live their lives, and ‘loving’ security is to create an insecure society so they can ‘love’ the idea of a police state. None of this is about the arguably higher intelligence of experiencing ‘happiness’, intelligence White men apparently can’t know how to measure.

The good news is, ‘White’ is a cultural phenomenon (state of mind) and no one need behave like these privileged White striped skunks:

Of this world’s 1,645 billionaires, 12 of them are Black, and of those twelve, the majority are Nigerian. Well, that should be no surprise, the biggest scam on the planet is a system where the eight top billionaires own as much as the world’s poorest half of the globe combined:

The world’s eight richest billionaires control the same wealth between them as the poorest half of the globe’s population, according to a charity warning of an ever-increasing and dangerous concentration of wealth

Just a step down in this story is where you find America’s Black billionaires, Oprah Winfrey and Michael Jordan, close to the 1% top:

“The richest 1% now has as much wealth as the rest of the world combined”

The total three American Black billionaires (Robert Smith is the 3rd) included in the world’s 12 Black billionaires of the world’s collective 1,645 billionaires, ‘own’ a significant chunk of the happiness of billions of colonized people and they’re not ‘sharing the sweatshop equity’ (read ‘sharing the sweatshop equity’ any way you like.)

Colonized? one might ask. That’s right, the wealth figures preceding were accomplished through the neo-corporate colonialism which had replaced colonialism, which never really went away but was ‘bait and switched’ … as in when a Belgian mercenary pilot assassinated (shot down) UN General Secretary Dag Hammerskold who was on his way to meet with Patrice Lumumba, the first democratically elected leader of ‘de-colonized’ Congo, who in turn was assassinated by MI6 (with body handed directly to CIA for disposal) and six or so million ‘blood diamond’ deaths later, we all know how that worked out for corporate stocks:

^ Doesn’t come across as White (at all)

The bad news is, you can be Black and culturally White, that is to say possess a European cultural mentality, behaving little differently to our neo-colonial masters. The White man Obama (handed off to his White grandparents for upbringing, by a single, White, CIA officer ‘mother’ who couldn’t handle raising a kid), giving a ‘Medal of Freedom’ to billionaire Michael Jordan, would seem little different if King Leopold of Belgium had conferred an award, making a certain Congolese colonial subject a countess, for her history of cooperative behavior, all the while setting a ‘proper’ example in the colonial system:

Human_Zoo

^ Human Zoo, Brussels, 1958

Civilization as we know it in the 21st Century is the economic legacy born of feudal Europe; or better said, the rest of us are all niggers, no matter the color of our skin, in the service of the White man’s top 1%. You believe you are free? If you were to stop working for the ‘man’ tomorrow, even if you supposedly ‘owned’ your house, you owe property tax. There is no better example par excellence of what is actually feudalism.

Now, going to the intelligence of ‘happiness’, which one makes more sense, a community that can set its own environmental standards and fence the nastiness out (that is NOT what happened with Keystone in South Dakota) or shoving unwanted environmental problems down people’s throats to a point they will hate you? (that IS what is happening with Keystone in South Dakota.) Take the same idea, and expand it to American corporate world domination (with Pentagon the enforcer), where “the pursuit of happiness” is not only denied across the planet, this denial causes a profound, visceral hatred, and associated problems, up to and including international ‘terror’ as a case of ‘chickens come home to roost.’ Now, tell me the White man is more intelligent and I’ll tell you, you can keep your White man’s IQ and you can shove it too:

As people became more agricultural and settled, the rich became richer as the ancient farmers who could afford oxen, cattle and other large animals increased their crop production. This provided significant opportunities for amassing and transmitting wealth, and the degree of household wealth-based inequality became much higher in Old World Eurasian contexts [versus the ‘uncivilized’ New World], as measured by house size.

“High degrees of inequality did not contribute to long-term stability in ancient societies. That is something that should concern us given the extraordinary high degree of inequality in our own society”

If anyone were to interpret this small essay as some rank apologetic for socialism, they couldn’t be more mistaken. If you were to take all of the world’s wealth and divide it equitably, you still haven’t yet escaped the White man’s IQ that treats natural resources, via euphemisms of ‘science’ coupled with ‘human progress’, as an exploitable bank account with infinite, unaccountable, overdraft potential. Mass extinction in the ‘anthropocene’ (here) would be the same effective result of redistribution of wealth, as opposed to SURRENDERING wealth, finally pointing  towards identical environmental outcome to capitalism.

Recalling the failed dialectic of Marxism, juxtaposed to today’s runaway corporate train, an IQ of happiness would begin with the idea civilization doesn’t need reformed, civilization needs dismantled. It might seem paradox to the ‘bought in’, but to begin down the path to happiness, via initiating dismantling of civilization with radical decentralization, is certainly not a rocket science requiring a White man’s IQ. Most of the environmentally damaged communities today are dirty because of hierarchy from the outside forcibly shitting on them; this is irrespective of whether it had been Marxist model or present corporate hierarchy, when in fact most ‘ordinary folk’ would prefer keeping a clean community.

So, relating to our dysfunction, which one got it right, Orwell or Huxley?

Conservative Sympathetic Failure

Orwell saw the future from a perspective describing a collective, but sequestered, sort of fundamentalism & hierarchy with strictured mentality you would find along the lines of his experience embedded in a colonial authority. A conservative church is in the Orwell model.

Liberal Sympathetic Failure

Huxley saw things along the lines of a dissolute, future ‘it’s all about me’ MTV generation or social orgy subjected to mass media manipulation and control. Social media, particularly Twitter, is in the Huxley model.

One being right did not make the other wrong. Sane people are caught-trapped somewhere on periphery of either or both models of hierarchy.

Despite some overlap, the very nature/extremism of both phenomena’ participants altogether kills any sort of sincere dialogue towards a way out of the mess, and that leaves everyone screwed, because it is precisely how the 1% keep their reign of corporate/colonizing military industrial insanity marching forward. Oops. None of it seems so bright.

“Fat, greedy, well-fed White people, have invented a language for us if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?” –George Carlin

He ain’t White ^

*

19,000 year old stone tools have been found at precisely the wrong end of the Americas (southern Chile), so yeah, where were those ‘land bridge’ North Americans prior to 14,500 years ago? As well, several Amazon tribes have been discovered to be the most closely related (of all modern peoples) to the Austral-Asian peoples of Papua and Australia; with no comparable (or even remote) intermediate genetic relationships to the north of their Amazon location until you get to the Aleutian Islands and a population of late arrivals from Siberia. The most common sense explanation is the ancestral Austral-Asian type found in the Amazon tribes’ genetics journeyed to South America about the same period as Papua and Australia were initially peopled (40,000 to 60,000 years ago.) But, all those anthropologists with ‘Boners for Beringia’ have stretched logic (and inflated their credulity) by insisting these Amazon tribes genetics could only have arrived via Siberia within the last 15,000 years; while ignoring “New Evidence Puts Man in North America 50,000 Years Ago.”  There are numerous problems with the 15,000 years ‘mainstream’ postulate; it ignores evidence from linguistics, it ignores other cultural evidence, it ignores physical evidence, and most of all, it ignores the primitive and nativistic nature of western empiricism’s roots.

What began this rant is, an example of White on White denial. God forbid a handful of White people might have been in North America 12,000 years ago … because this would put a big dent in the ego of the White people who were concerned a mere 500+ years ago they might sail off the edge of the flat Earth. Never mind Copernicus and Galileo had some idea things like our planet might be round and rotating around the Sun a hundred or two hundred years before that. If White people had made it from Europe to North America in the ancient past, before earliest rise of so-called ‘Western Civilization’, what does that say about the White people whose science was killing their patients with blood-letting doctors as recently as 200 years ago? So, what is the example of recent hysterical denial of anthropology in relation to this? An 18 month old boy, found in Montana, who’d buried more than 12,000 years ago. Oh, and the fact he wasn’t White. This find, as posed by science, doesn’t square with Native Oral History and in the same moment, if you look at some facts conveniently ignored, suddenly it does square with Blackfoot Oral history but the anthropologists will flush this down the commode (like a junkie with the police at his door) at every opportunity. More on this, but first:

There is completely ignored (by physical & cultural anthropologists) linguistics study from the 1990s, pointing to Native American migration beginning in South America some 40,000 years ago indicating migration from south to north:

“When North America was an ice-age tundra, the first Americans were “cooking” their cultures in the tropical south, moving northward and settling as the glaciers retreated, according to new linguistic evidence from indigenous languages throughout the New World.

“The evidence suggests that humans have been in the Americas for a very long time, perhaps 40,000 years. It also suggests that most native American languages derived from Ice Age inhabitants who were isolated in the Western Hemisphere for many millennia.

“Only along the west coast do languages appear to come from immigrants who arrived after the Ice Age 14,000 years ago, a Berkeley linguist reports”

The linguistics study is consistent with Blackfoot Oral History.

But when advances in DNA supported this preceding study, physical and cultural anthropology couldn’t bring themselves to admit to the possibility, and so they invented ‘trapped in Beringia’ for 20,000 years:

“UF [University of Florida] scientists analyzed DNA sequences from Native American, New World and Asian populations with the understanding that modern DNA is forged by an accumulation of events in the distant past, and merged their findings with data from existing archaeological, geological and paleoecological studies.

“The result is a unified, interdisciplinary theory of the “peopling” of the New World, which shows a gradual migration and expansion of people from Asia through Siberia and into Beringia starting about 40,000 years ago; a long waiting period in Beringia where the population size remained relatively stable; and finally a rapid expansion into North America through Alaska or Canada about 15,000 years ago”

The problem with the preceding is, it does not take into account the languages requiring diffusion over a vast area and the evidence the languages provide pointing to a migration from the south with only the most recent languages making the Siberia connection, and in a limited West coast geography. Unfortunately, the UF “interdisciplinary theory” seems to lack inclusiveness with any study pointing to credible alternatives.

Then we have the Solutrean points of Western Europe:

solutrean

Compared to the Clovis points of North America:

clovis Point

The proposal the Native American Clovis is derived from the Western Europe’s Solutrean… is also consistent with Blackfoot Oral History…

Working at multiple sites across the continent, researchers found nanodiamonds – microscopic particles thought to be found on comets – in a 13,000-year-old layer of rich sedimentary soil called a “black mat.” Beneath the layer with the nanodiamonds, fossils of the animals are abundant. After that layer, they disappear, West said.

“It’s extraordinary that tens of millions of animals disappeared synchronously at exactly the time when the diamonds and carbon layer are laid down across the continent,” said West, whose co-authors include DePaul University chemist Wendy Wolbach.

Arrowheads and other artifacts from the Clovis culture of humans – an early hunter-gatherer society – also vanish after the black mat was laid down 13,000 years ago

Read more at: http://phys.org/news150097682.html#jCp

…but has been dismissed by anthropologists claiming the DNA Native Americans hold in common with Paleolithic Western Europeans of roughly the same era cannot have come via the Atlantic route because of another, 24,000 year old, boy found in Southern Siberia (a LONG ways from Beringia) with European genes also has DNA markers common to modern Native Americans:

“Genetically, this individual had no east Asian resemblance but looked like Europeans and people from west Asia. But the thing that was really mind-blowing was that there were signatures you only see in today’s Native Americans”

But the boy can’t be Native American according to land bridge worshiping anthropologists with this far-fetched logic:

“Willerslev’s team suggests that after the ancestors of Native Americans split off from those of east Asians, they moved north. Somewhere in Siberia, they met another group of people coming east from western Eurasia — the people to whom the Mal’ta boy belonged. The two groups mingled, and their descendants eventually travelled east into North America”

The automatic assumption is the South Siberian boy is the ancestral type which did not appear in North America until 10,000 years later, demanding the unique Native American DNA markers arrived via the Bering land bridge only 15,000  years ago. This stretch of the imagination presumes the boy from 24,000 years ago has a bloodline which had come from very far away from where would be expected (Western Europe) and yet absolutely no thought is given to the idea the modern, exclusively Native American DNA match also found in the boy could have originated with a population already in the Americas for 16,000 years prior to the Siberian boys death some 24,000 years ago. In effect, it is demanded by science that if you put a 24,000 year old uniquely Native American bloodline with shared DNA of Western Europe’s Paleolithic people, in southern Siberia, as far from its Western European Paleolithic roots as it is from uniquely Native American matched DNA, it has to be European/Asian precursor of people who later migrated to the Americans and cannot be Native American. The Bering land bridge is demanded to be a one way street and no one is allowed to live on the American side of the bridge prior to 15,000 years past. It never occurs to the anthropologists the Siberian boy might have Native American ancestry which had migrated from the Americas to Siberia within the past 25,000 or so years, no matter how much more sense this might make. It is (direct line) 4,000 miles from Portugal, where you would expect to find the Western European Paleolithic genetic makers (and from where a sea crossing might be made) to Florida and by far more distance overland (via Siberia) west to east than the direct (west to east) 10,000 miles from Portugal to near where the genetically related (to the Siberian) Montana boy was found. The anthropological assumption automatically denies people might have known how to make sea crossings between 12,000 and 40,000 years ago. This specific denial can only be founded on the ethno-centric bias of scientists whose own history indicates a belief in a flat Earth a mere 500+ years past (ok, so this last was a Washington Irving joke but it’s not far off the mark.)

And the insistence there could not have been an Atlantic crossing to explain the European genetic markers is hammered on:

“This new origin story helps to resolve several peculiarities in New World archaeology. For example, ancient skulls found in both North and South America have features that do not resemble those of East Asians. They also carry the mitochondrial haplogroup X, which is related to western Eurasian lineages but not to east Asian ones.

“On the basis of these features, some scientists have suggested that Native Americans descended from Europeans who sailed west across the Atlantic. However, says Willerslev, “you don’t need a hypothesis that extreme””

A simple but undesirable “hypothesis that extreme” of a 4,000 mile sea voyage has been replaced with a hyper-convoluted and much less likely hypothesis a more than the (direct west to east line) 10,000 mile overland trek requiring 20,000 years ‘trapped in Beringia’ to protect the land bridge theory.

Now let’s return to the boy from 12,000+ years ago found in Montana and identified with Clovis culture and the sweeping assumptions surrounding his discovery:

“another theory, supported only by archaeological evidence, was that ancient Native Americans came from people who migrated across the Atlantic Ocean from Western Europe before the last Ice Age—the so-called Solutrean hypothesis. “This genetic study provides unequivocal evidence that this did not happen,” said coauthor Michael Waters, a geoarcheologist at the Texas A&M University

“[the] genome also suggests that modern Native Americans are direct descendants of the Clovis population. The ancient genome is similar to those of peoples from both North and South America, suggesting that a single founding population migrated into the Americas close to the time of the last Ice Age” [in effect, 15,000 years ago]

More hammering by the anthros on killing the Atlantic crossing, they never tire of it but here’s a bit more:

A new DNA study has found sudden explosion of particular male Y chromosomes in the Americas about 15,000 years ago. This would fit nicely with the arrival of Solutrean (i.e. Clovis) technology from Europe…

“The best explanation is that they may have resulted from advances in technology that could be controlled by small groups of men. Wheeled transport, metal working and organised warfare are all candidate explanations that can now be investigated further”

…but the study avoids any mention of the possibility of a Solutrean source of this event in the Americas as though it were plague. But in fact the timeline bears investigating in this regard; if there were a single, small, incursion of Solutrean technology into the Americas around the end of that culture in Europe 16,000 years ago, a 15,000 years ago genetics impact in the Americas is not implausible; as it would take some time for the seed or understanding of the new technology to take hold in a demonstrated way. By 13,500 years ago Clovis has been established. This is not an unreasonable timeline to mesh 3 events; 1) arrival of Solutrean technology 2) associated Y chromosome explosion by those adopting the technology and 3) establishment of Clovis technology.

Going to the western science endemic denial and omission of possibilities, just for a laugh, let’s try this:

In the year 14016, precisely 12,000 years into our post-nuclear world’s future, archaeologists dig up a Native American in the uniform of the French Foreign Legion, in Africa. The automatic assumption could easily be ‘His genetic markers proves the French were Native Americans.’ Or, ‘Black Africans colonized the Central African Republic and exterminated the aboriginal [Native American] inhabitants’ based on a 10,000 years old previous [genetically Black African] find. These scenarios are no more far-fetched than the land bridge worshipers proposals.

The actual problem I’m pointing to here is, culture (and associated tools) are not necessarily race/genetic specific. A sweeping claim based on a single example, the Montana burial, is like determining a French speaking Black African cannot trace his cultural origin to Alsace or Normandy. Culture is not DNA, one cannot be categorically tied to the other. Widely divergent peoples borrow or swap ideas. Now, to a related controversy:

The Clovis culture was proposed to have been wiped out (together with the mega-fauna) by a comet impact, causing the so-called ‘Younger Dryas’ period in archaeology.

Working at multiple sites across the continent, researchers found nanodiamonds – microscopic particles thought to be found on comets – in a 13,000-year-old layer of rich sedimentary soil called a “black mat.” Beneath the layer with the nanodiamonds, fossils of the animals are abundant. After that layer, they disappear, West said.

“It’s extraordinary that tens of millions of animals disappeared synchronously at exactly the time when the diamonds and carbon layer are laid down across the continent,” said West, whose co-authors include DePaul University chemist Wendy Wolbach.

Arrowheads and other artifacts from the Clovis culture of humans – an early hunter-gatherer society – also vanish after the black mat was laid down 13,000 years ago

Read more at: http://phys.org/news150097682.html#jCp

“Working at multiple sites across the continent, researchers found nanodiamonds – microscopic particles thought to be found on comets – in a 13,000-year-old layer of rich sedimentary soil called a “black mat.” Beneath the layer with the nanodiamonds, fossils of the animals are abundant. After that layer, they disappear

“It’s extraordinary that tens of millions of animals disappeared synchronously at exactly the time when the diamonds and carbon layer are laid down across the continent”

“Arrowheads and other artifacts from the Clovis culture of humans – an early hunter-gatherer society – also vanish after the black mat was laid down 13,000 years ago”

This is consistent with Blackfoot Oral History but the Bering land bridge worshipers scream ‘Fantasy!‘ …

“The theory has reached zombie status,” said Professor Andrew Scott from the Department of Earth Sciences at Royal Holloway. “Whenever we are able to show flaws and think it is dead, it reappears with new, equally unsatisfactory, arguments. Hopefully new versions of the theory will be more carefully examined before they are published”

“The theory has reached zombie status,” said Professor Andrew Scott from the Department of Earth Sciences at Royal Holloway. “Whenever we are able to show flaws and think it is dead, it reappears with new, equally unsatisfactory, arguments.

“Hopefully new versions of the theory will be more carefully examined before they are published.”

Read more at: http://phys.org/news/2013-01-prehistoric-humans-comet.html#jCp

… concerning the comet theory, claiming, among other things, contaminated samples compromised the North American study but required ignoring this multiple continents study:

“We present detailed geochemical and morphological analyses of nearly 700 spherules from 18 sites in support of a major cosmic impact at the onset of the Younger Dryas episode (12.8 ka). The impact distributed ∼10 million tonnes of melted spherules over 50 million square kilometers on four continents. Origins of the spherules by volcanism, anthropogenesis, authigenesis, lightning, and meteoritic ablation are rejected on geochemical and morphological grounds. The spherules closely resemble known impact materials derived from surficial sediments melted at temperatures >2,200 °C. The spherules correlate with abundances of associated melt-glass, nanodiamonds, carbon spherules, aciniform carbon, charcoal, and iridium

Airbursts/impacts by a fragmented comet or asteroid have been proposed at the Younger Dryas onset (12.80 ± 0.15 ka) based on identification of an assemblage of impact-related proxies, including microspherules, nanodiamonds, and iridium. Distributed across four continents at the Younger Dryas boundary (YDB), spherule peaks have been independently confirmed in eight studies, but unconfirmed in two others, resulting in continued dispute about their occurrence, distribution, and origin. To further address this dispute and better identify YDB spherules, we present results from one of the largest spherule investigations ever undertaken regarding spherule geochemistry, morphologies, origins, and processes of formation. We investigated 18 sites across North America, Europe, and the Middle East, performing nearly 700 analyses on spherules using energy dispersive X-ray spectroscopy for geochemical analyses and scanning electron microscopy for surface microstructural characterization. Twelve locations rank among the world’s premier end-Pleistocene archaeological sites, where the YDB marks a hiatus in human occupation or major changes in site use. Our results are consistent with melting of sediments to temperatures >2,200 °C by the thermal radiation and air shocks produced by passage of an extraterrestrial object through the atmosphere; they are inconsistent with volcanic, cosmic, anthropogenic, lightning, or authigenic sources. We also produced spherules from wood in the laboratory at >1,730 °C, indicating that impact-related incineration of biomass may have contributed to spherule production. At 12.8 ka, an estimated 10 million tonnes of spherules were distributed across ∼50 million square kilometers, similar to well-known impact strewnfields and consistent with a major cosmic impact event”

This is also consistent with Blackfoot Oral History as explained to myself by Floyd Heavyrunner in a close association that spanned 37 years:

The Blackfoot precursor people arrived by sea in the very far south during the period of the mega-fauna. They migrated north where they encountered a race of Whites they had inter-married with, and these Whites taught them survival in their new land. Specifically, clearly, they were taught how to make stone points. There also was a celestial impact that destroyed their world together with the mega-fauna and left few survivors. These are the stories of two separate peoples who mingled into one people. What is not clear is whether they met and mingled pre or post impact. The White race they mingled with seems to have been a scarce minority or remnant people, and this fact tends me to believe it was post impact, but we actually do not know. What is clear, from the Blackfoot Oral historical view is, there had been inter-racial and inter-cultural mixing in the Americas. There was an impact event. And it follows, after the impact, there would be large areas of North America vacated of previous life and culture, opening these areas wide to migrants from the south, consistent with the linguistics study cited towards the beginning of this article and Blackfoot Oral History. And a stone point cannot be specific to DNA, no different to French language cannot be specific to the DNA of Northern Europe, millions of Black Africans speak French. Entire Native American tribes now only speak English, pointing to culture (language IS a cultural marker) cannot necessarily be definitively tied to any one populations bloodlines.

Thought provoking, but tangential and yet to be fully explored is the fact of Polynesian DNA found in South America:

“”Everything was both surprising and exciting from the very start,” Pena says. “The first thought that came to my mind was that we had the rule out the possibility of some contamination, although it would be difficult exactly of that kind, since there were no Polynesian individuals in the chain of custody.” Another lab ultimately independently confirmed these findings”

And Native American blood found in Polynesia:

“the ancient Polynesian people who populated Easter Island, or Rapa Nui, were not as isolated as long believed. Scientists who conducted a genetic study, published on Thursday in the journal Current Biology, found these ancient people had significant contact with Native American populations hundreds of years before the first Westerners reached the island in 1722…

“…Genetic data on 27 Easter Island natives indicated that interbreeding between the Rapa Nui and native people in South America occurred roughly between 1300 and 1500.

“We found evidence of gene flow between this population and Native American populations, suggesting an ancient ocean migration route between Polynesia and the Americas,” said geneticist Anna-Sapfo Malaspinas of the Center for GeoGenetics at the University of Copenhagen, who led the study”

And then you have pre-Columbian, American sweet potato migration from Ecuador and Peru to Polynesia:

“Using complementary sets of markers (chloroplast and nuclear microsatellites) and both modern and herbarium samples, we test the tripartite hypothesis. Our results provide strong support for prehistoric transfer(s) of sweet potato from South America (Peru-Ecuador region) into Polynesia”

And then, the bottle gourd is particularly interesting, cultivated in Mexico for 10,000 years:

“Domesticated bottle gourds have been identified in the Americas at sites such as Guila Naquitz in Mexico by ~10,000 years ago. DNA sequences of rinds discovered in precontact America are of the Asian sub-variety” *

Now, the problem with this (for the land bridge worshipers) is Asian bottle gourds are not likely going to drift across the Pacific to Mexico, the currents between subtropical Asia and Subtropical America are predominately the opposite direction:

pacific_ocean_currents

And what are the chances a sub-tropical plant is going to find its way on foot from south Asia via Siberian climate, across the land bridge and down to Mexico? Pretty far-fetched. The most likely scenario is the bottle gourd came across the Pacific in the possession of a sea-faring people previous to 10,000 years ago. In fact these gourds are found across Polynesia.

And then, the pre-Columbian Polynesian chicken introduction to South America also suggests prevailing currents point away from the gourd floating to sub-tropical regions of the Americas:

“Computer simulations suggest that voyaging eastward from Polynesia in the southern hemisphere where the mid-latitude westerlies are more accessible, is a more likely prospect than a northern route to the Americas. These southern hemisphere voyages would have brought landfalls in the central and southern regions of Chile and could have introduced the Polynesian chicken to South America”

What is interesting in the preceding is, pre-Colombian peoples are acknowledged to have been all over the Pacific, from Polynesia to South America, beginning from the Asian side, up to 4,000 years or farther in the past. So, why not the Atlantic 12,000 years ago? Or the Pacific 40,000 years previous to present? The answer is as simple as looking at your hand in front of your face, it is the ego of a recently primitive culture, represented in Western Anthropology, demands no Native Americans, the peoples whose lives they had destroyed, got anything right, before Copernicus, Galileo and Western culture’s adoption of Plato. But don’t forget, these people’s ‘civilization’ were still burning witches when Columbus landed in the Americas. Solutrean isn’t dead, it merely isn’t proven. But then, neither is much of what is taken as gospel by science proven. I have a good laugh, time to time, when it occurs the people and culture who were burning heretics a mere 500 years ago, hold to anything considered to be a definitive or empirically proven or dis-proven ‘truth.’

How about a ‘litmus test’ of self-veracity for western science? The human appendix was faithfully described by science as a ‘vestigial organ’ for what seemed like a very long time (how many decades? Centuries?) and then an ‘Eureka!’ moment came along within the last decade; the human appendix is a perfectly modern, functional organ whose purpose is restarting the gut flora, following a case of dysentery. It follows, it is immaterial whether Solutrean people were White or Black, whether they possibly walked over ice via Greenland or possibly arrived by sea, or didn’t arrive at all. What is material is, the culture that produced western science, that is to say science itself, in a sense, is still burning heretics.

Meanwhile, the ‘anthros’ discover Australasian blood in Brazil and the Aleutian islands, and (grudgingly) push the ‘first’ Americans arrival back to a possible 23,000 years (whilst ignoring the 50,000 years find), recalling:

19,000 year old stone tools have been found at precisely the wrong end of the Americas (southern Chile), so yeah, where were those ‘land bridge’ North Americans prior to 14,500 years ago? As well, several Amazon tribes have been discovered to be the most closely related (of all modern peoples) to the Austral-Asian peoples of Papua and Australia; with no comparable (or even remote) intermediate genetic relationships to the north of their Amazon location until you get to the Aleutian Islands and a population of late arrivals from Siberia. The most common sense explanation is the ancestral Austral-Asian type found in the Amazon tribes’ genetics journeyed to South America about the same period as Papua and Australia were initially peopled (40,000 to 60,000 years ago.) But, all those anthropologists with ‘Boners for Beringia’ have stretched logic (and inflated their credulity) by insisting these Amazon tribes genetics could only have arrived via Siberia within the last 15,000 years; while ignoring “New Evidence Puts Man in North America 50,000 Years Ago.”  There are numerous problems with this ‘mainstream’ postulate; it ignores evidence from linguistics, it ignores other cultural evidence, it ignores physical evidence, and most of all, it ignores the primitive and nativistic nature of western empiricism’s roots.

Relevant to this immediate preceding, it is clear from a BBC article the anthros with Boners for Beringia will never allow for a European (Solutrean) presence as they continue to deny, equivocate, stretch the imagination (in most close minded ways) and otherwise stick to the land bridge ‘scientific’ orthodoxy:

“[So] the fanciful ideas that somehow the Americas were populated by people coming from Europe and all kinds of other places are wrong”

But now that we have Australasian commonality (recalling culture transits populations entirely independent of genetics), close your eyes and have a listen to the music of the Malind tribe of West Papua; it is little different to something you would hear at a Blackfoot celebration on America’s Northern Plains:

* Since I’d published an initial version of this analysis as “Apple Indians & Anthropology” (February 2014), the linked article on the bottle-gourd story has been amended to omit the “Asian sub-variety” (dna) quote and changed to emphasize a larger study that essentially buried the result of the study finding pre-Columbian rinds with dna pointing to the Asian variety. What appears to have happened is, by adding in study of modern gourds found in the Americas, the people who insist the bottle gourd floated from Africa to the Americas, essentially are inferring the ancient rinds found with Asian dna are somehow irrelevant because they could not recover some of the genetic information the previous study had identified (one gets the impression there was little motivation to accomplish this), as well the new study shows other problems (an analogy would be to be bury the odd facts that don’t fit the new study as an anomaly within the numbers.)

In the new study, there are several glaring stretches of possibilities on top of the fact the ancient dispersal model does not even consider the possibility of human transport of the gourds by sea; the largest stretch postulates the rare African wild gourd varieties made multiple ancient crossings of the Atlantic on their own in a 10,000 years past window of time that does not appear to have been repeated before or since. Also overlooked is the ‘coincidence’ these gourds had been domesticated in Asia and the Americas for 10,000 years plus but only in Africa much later.

The real conclusion supported throughout is, when it comes to protecting one’s turf, science is as dirty as politics.

I saw in this land an Indian woman and a child who would not stand out among white blonds. These people [of the upper class] say that they were the children of the idols” [gods] – Pedro Pizarro, chronicler of the Spanish conquest of Peru

“The remarks made by Pizarro as to the skin- colour of the Peruvians are very important and, probably, truthful. Today one finds people who claim to be pure Indian in blood who are very light in colour, but it is not possible to be sure that they have not some white blood”  Note 139, page 528, The Discovery and Conquest of The Kingdoms of Peru by Pedro Pizarro in Two Volumes, Volume II, translated into English and annotated by
 Philip Ainsworth Means, The Cortes Society, New York (1921)

12 March 2017 update: Platinum deposits matching the iridium deposits reinforce a possibility of the Solutrian  hypothesis…

https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2017-03/uosc-udo030917.php

…indicating possibility of relief for the pathological Beringia priapism –

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‘Apple Indians’ is a wonderful terminology for the not-so-politically-correct. It is a great term when applied to to the politically correct Western anthropology programs disguised with the euphemism ‘Native Studies.’ And here is why:

The term for a Black man translates from Blackfoot language as “Black White Man” and the thought behind this is completely alien to modern western ideation. The Blackfoot “Black White Man” derives from interaction with the Black cavalry regiment stationed north of Browning during the military occupation of the Blackfeet reservation (into the 1930s.) “Black” is descriptive solely in a superficial sense and when coupled to “White”, points directly to European mentality or state of mind and is not primarily concerned with skin color. This is reinforced with the Cree translation for White Man (from ‘moon-e-yas’) being essentially identical concept: “Not like us” in a sense of thought process. This again loops back in identical sense in the proper Blackfoot term for a White Man per se: ‘Napi Kwan’ or “White Man” refers to someone who is crazy from a cultural perspective and figures in the Blackfoot proverb “Everyone knows the White Man is crazy.” All of the translations taken with the proverb point to color as superficial or descriptive only, with the emphasis on state of mind or thought process. Old Man the fool, Napi to the Blackfeet, and the ‘Napi’ in the Blackfoot expression ‘Napi Kwan’ that translate as White Man, are one and the same. In the present times, when we see modern academics discuss Race in relation to Native America, particularly when those academics skins are Red, we are witnessing European mentality co-opting original Native thought, because in the old native way of thinking, there is no concept of race. Humanity is expressed solely through thought process and resultant behaviors. And for this reason, I think the term ‘Apple Indians’ is absolutely apropos in relation to the oxymoron of ‘native studies’ in the Western education. No different to ‘Black White Man’ accurately portrays Spike Lee from an ancient Native point of view.

Now, the western culture, having taken over our native peoples, will never admit they have created a politically correct academic program as another step in the cultural assimilation of native peoples, employing Western anthropology to accomplish what amounts to utilizing people with so-called ‘Red skins’ in ongoing ethnocide, and certified it as ‘academic science.’ Why? Because they are too busy self-inflating over their superiority to the so-called ‘primitives’ with investigation into man’s origins in the Americas. Forget Oral History, forget Native applied, practical philosophy, forget any thought that might be a threat to the Western sciences’ ethno-centric bias and Plato. Platonic-Cartesian thought (Western science) is a self-worshipping god with a narrow rut of inquiry and a dogma. Essentially a self-perpetrating lie.

chief2

My question to my Native sisters and brothers in academia is, what do you think you could ever accomplish learning from these people? Forget it, toss your degrees in the trash, go home and preserve the language and stories, there really is nothing better out there.

Related:

Life in Indian Country

Collected stories, folklore and anecdotes concerning my many years life with Blackfeet Indians and traversing Native American territories

As I bail out of the game, here is the gift of all (or nearly all) of the ronaldthomaswest.com articles in a single page of links; beginning with stories of travels through India, then, my personal life adventures largely centered in Native America, if only because I believe this is my most under-appreciated work and deserves greater exposure. Following these accounts are things I personally find interesting, next are external links to books authored by myself and then my satire. Lastly, scroll down to find that work I most detest, the work which had inspired the satire (a sort of therapy) – to discover the real evils of geopolitics.

My Madcap Adventure (tales of a journey to India)

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 1 From Indian country to India

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 2 New Delhi, round one

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 3 On character

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 4 Into the Himalayan foothills

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 5 Sanarth & the Buddha

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 6 Varanasi part one

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 7 Varanasi part two

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 8 Varanasi part three

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 9 Katmandu

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 10 Trisuli River

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 11 Chitwan National Park

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 12 Katmandu reprise

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 13 Back to Hotel Imperial

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 14 The riots begin

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 15 To the Taj Palace Hotel

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 16 Out of Delhi!

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 17 Cairo-London-New York

My Madcap Adventure, Episode 18 Aftermath

My Madcap Adventure, Epilogue (Notes) corrections/disclaimers

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Life in Indian Country:

Life in Blackfoot Country Learning to go hungry

Keeping a Pipe On forgotten knowledge

Pipe Maker A story with a moral

The Novice A story with a moral

The Stick Game Native quantum mechanics (the witches)

The Legend of the Blackfoot Titan Mik-api

Happy the Indian Guide Indian stereotypes

Raven and Thunder Blackfoot Law of Matriarchy

Strawberry Medicine Men and a Stellar Jay

Napi in the New Age A ‘red apple’ story (satire)

Essay on Native American Humor Why I’m not politically correct

Junípero Serra On house breaking dogs (Catholic style)

The DIA and Shamanism Failed exploitation of indigenous knowledge

Native Americans and Race Race is BS to authentic Indians

Michele Bachmann & Wild Indians Satire

Apple Indians & Anthropology Anthropology as a faith-based initiative

Modern Indian Society A short history of cultural transition

Losers A Native perspective of Plato & western science

The Legacy of Russell Means ‘think twice’

New Age Homicide for $MONEY$ ‘think thrice’

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Just stuff:

Nixtamal

Condensed for the Absolutely & Truly Dense

Thomas Paine

French Peacekeepers

Raphael’s Paradox

Brownie, a Weimaraner A folk story

Original Sin is a Hate Crime Abuse of women & nature

The Gospel According to Ronald On the historical Jesus

To Forgive is a Crime To excuse the inexcusable

Ron’s Conspiracy Theory Cosmology is the conspiracy

You’ve Got Apes! European cultural mentality

A Spy in the House of the Unloved Refuting Anias Nin

A Coward Called Machismo Observations on Machismo

How I rose from the dead (40 years after)

The More Important Blessing Quotes

Mr Chan A true story of real charity

Bruno the Bear Animal stereotypes

Recreating a Hot Spring in Your Bathtub A memory of Yellowstone

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My Books (external links)

Penucquem Speaks 30 years life with Blackfeet Indians

Napi Mephisto on cross-cultural encounters

Queer Chicken Dinner refuting Jack Kerouac

Cosmos & Consciousness on reality

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The Satires

March of the Tickle Dicks pictorial

The Logic Behind The American Vote thumbnail satire

Moot Court The Donald vs Ted Cruz

Whereas the Enemy of Your Friend is Your Favorite F**K

Urolagnetics On Scientology

Junípero Serra On house breaking dogs (Catholic style)

MERGE On Chomsky’s theory

People Who Behave As Stupid As They Look Uh-huh

Who Punked the Cardinal? On Vatican Fashion

Opus Dei creavit monitor lacertae Charlie Hebdo & satire

Alfreda Bikowski & the Definition of Stupid Only at the CIA

Obama’s Speech at Queensland Parody

Liberals On multiculturalism

Obama’s Speech to Skull & Bones A parody of his UN address

Teleprompter Forget it, you don’t want to go there

Thuck Norris Rated ‘S’ for SICK (parental advisory)

Democracy Now! State secrets & the war in Liberacestan

Michele Bachmann & Wild Indians Kerouac in drag

Dick Cheney’s Rottweiler Dog butt-sniffing rituals

Maison de l’Histoire de France Fellatio, Sarkozy & French history

The Great Phuc Uuus Massacre Propaganda trained CIA lizards

Bozo’s Handcock U Speech George Bush & Tony Blair in love

My Life as a Joke Personal Ad (women only please)

The Pachuco Stare Decisis SCOTUS = SCROTUM

The Moron Bernard-Henry Lévy He truly is a moron

How Jesus Gets Kicked Out Of Heaven Naughty George Carlin

NOT My Last Tango in Paris The NSA & cyanide suppositories

Demons Anonymous Addiction to destructive fantasies

Saint Chester Prince of the Church & patron saint of boys

A Conversation With Jon Stewart Barack Obama is a White man!

Scooby Doo is Lyndon LaDouche ‘Rut a retard’

Saki & Barf: killer women of the State Department Just rude

Salinas vs Texas U.S. Supreme Court self inflicted lawyer joke

Life’s Little Surprises A devil teaches law

Happy the Indian Guide On stereotypes

Napi in the New Age A ‘red apple’ Indian story

Mother’s Day and Male Dopes Moms & cannabis

Breakfast at a Pizzaria The German ‘I hate my life’ philosophy

Our Gang rascals too big for their breeches

World Cup Scribbles Rabies & dog muzzles

English Football International competition

Sardonism Adults Playing Cowboys and Indians

The Gospel According to Ronald On the historical Jesus

The Islamic State for Dummies The K.I.S.S. principle

NATO’s Three Chihuahuas Small dog syndrome

Essay On Native American Humor ‘Napi Eats His Butt’ (Best satire)

Perverts of Western Philosophy Locke to de Sade (and more)

A Cheesey Detective Story (the short lived series)

Episode 1

Episode 2

Guest Satire:

Raghead Political satire by Bill Purkayastha

Admiral John Kirby Comedy straight out of the Pentagon

About Clowns DJ Rankin

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The NAZI Meme

Deep State I

Deep State II

Deep State III

Deep State IV

Deep State V

Deep State VI

Hillary Clinton in Four Short Paragraphs

Intelligence Agencies & Wikipedia

The CIA And Nonviolent Resistance

God’s Chosen is a Dumb Idea 

The Secret Team is The Family

Profits of War

Fear of Minor Debris

The Alpha Chronology

Reorganizing Murder Incorporated 

Square Pegs in Round Holes:

“We Tortured Some Folks”

Fear of Minor Debris

Intelligence Agencies & Wikipedia

Laura Poitras’ Myopia

Death of a MOSSAD Agent

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On Ukraine:

Denial

Stratfor Chief

Winning Ugly

Reuters & A Fixed Verdict

Kiev’s Nazis

Black Boxes, Dark Arts & Geopolitics

If Russia Were To Back Down on MH 17 ?

Elliot Higgins on MH 17

Poison Fruit Encore 1

Obama’s Ukraine

The New Great Game

USAID & Chevron

Victoria Nuland’s Wedding

Germany’s Martyrs of the Maidan

John Kerry’s neo-nazi snipers

The CIA and a Liar’s Fastrack

Dominionism’s Fingers in Kiev

The Washington Post & Double Think

The Disinformation Nation

The Ascension of The Morons

Poison Fruit Encore 2

People Who Behave As Stupid As They Look

Admiral John Kirby

Mutti, Piggies and the Minsk Peace Accord

The Intercept Takes A Dive 

The Intercept Takes A Dive Episode 2

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Related stuff:

What Do Putin’s Adviser’s Know? You can listen right here

Sergei Lavrov’s UN Speech Russia’s Foreign Minister on 27 Sept 2014

Putin’s Speech of 24 October 2014 Sane by comparison with NATO

Tactical Nuclear Weapons for Dummies Pentagon fantasies

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Arab Spring:

Overview

Egypt Round Two

Syria Part One

Syria Part Two

Syria Part Three 

Syria Part Four

The Islamic State for Dummies

NATO, God & Military Mafia

Western Democracies, Salafist Militia & Syria 

Litmus Test

Lies by Omission

Friday the 13th in Paris

The Real Intelligence on Our Leaders

Whereas the Enemy of Your Friend is Your Favorite F**K

Letter to Doctors Without Borders 

NATO’s Most Censored Story

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Other stuff:

Parting Shot On media

Throwing Stones From Glass Houses Social-political commentary

Vice and MI6

Seymour Hersh & Mythology

Machine Pistol

Fletcher Prouty and the Secret Team (Today)

Defense One Zero Hedge Drinks The Kool Aid

Médecins Sans Frontiéres

USAID in Central Africa

Reuters & A Fixed Verdict

Truth Jockeys

Why NSA Wants Your Metadata

Farewell to the Black White-Man

Boris Nemtsov

Chevron & USAID

Alfreda Bikowski & the Definition of Stupid

Paranoia of Dianne Feinstein

In the Shoes of an Insurgent

Square Pegs in Round Holes

Metadata & Panorama

Reorganizing Murder Incorporated

Votes and Vanishing Acts

Poison Fruit

The Left’s Anti-Federalist Urban Legend

CIA vs JFK

The Navy Yard Reporting Smells Wrong

MOSSAD and Jews for Jesus

“We Tortured Some Folks”

Hillary Clinton in Four Short Paragraphs

Stupid is as Stupid Does

Mojahedin-e-Khalq

Military Sock Puppets, NSA Trolls & CIA Shills

CIA & The Media

WikiLeaks & Spy Agencies

Noteworthy Information Operations

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More stuff:

Throwing Stones From Glass Houses

Why the FBI Will Never Investigate the Biggest Criminals

CIA and Public Relations

VICE & The CIA

Greek Tragedy

Winning Ugly

Truth Jockeys

Greek Hubris

How To Make Powerful Enemies In Four Short Paragraphs

People Too Stupid to Understand They’re Stupid

Holocaust & Narrative Perversion

See’s Sampler

Stupid is as Stupid Does

NATO’s Three Chihuahuas

Evil Cynics, Stooges & Dupes

Empire & Blow-back

Erik Prince & Pedophile Priests

The NSA’s Egregious Liar

Robert Seldon Lady, CIA Slime-Bag

Cheap Tricks for Jesus

The Economics of Moonshine Whiskey

Celebrating the Anti-Christ

Enlightenment: The Automated Death Machine

Napi Mephisto

Snowden & Snooping

Uncle Sam, Dominionist Puppet

Of Nukes, Courage and Cowards

Outline of a Snowden Legal Defense

Color of Law, Star Chamber, FISA & PRISM

The Greatest Criminal Endeavor

Our Vital National Interests

How to Make Powerful Enemies in Three Short Paragraphs

How to Make Powerful Enemies In a Few Paragraphs

If  The Left Are Sheep, The Right Are Fish

The (No) ‘Establishment’ Clause

North Carolina’s 2nd Secession From the Union

EXBERLINER (1)

EXBERLINER (2)

EXBERLINER (3)

EXBERLINER (4)

Post Modern Teutonic Vision

The USA vs The Teutons

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A little more about books:

GLADIO

Profits of War

Invective

David Ignatius’ Body of Lies

John Le Carre’s A Delicate Truth

Robert Littell’s The Company

No Snowflake in an Avalanche

Dirty Wars

Should I be a Spy Novelist?

To The Far Right Christian Hater

A Report to an Academy

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My blog had begun attracting readers in mid 2014, when I’d been giving it real attention for several months. This upcoming week of 21 March 2016, coinciding with withdrawing from giving ronaldthomaswest.com sustained attention, it will pass the 100,000 hits mark (it stands at 99,685 as I write this.)

Hardly some mega-phenomena but not bad either. Now, it’s just another internet archive –

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S1

All original material copyright Ⓒ 2015 by Ronald Thomas West: For profit & mass paper media redistribution prohibited

 

rene-descartes

 Vivum
Sectus
Aperta
Sine
Anaesthesia

From the superior English torturers smirk we now arrive at the uniquely French pout of smug vanity. Going to the Egyptian “to speak of the dead is to make them live again” we’ll perform a vivisection on the reanimated nose of René Descartes returned to life as a cat:

Descartes_Cat

“I find it almost impossible to believe that René Descartes, not known as a monster, carried his philosophical belief that only humans have minds to such a confident extreme that he would blithely spread-eagle a live mammal on a board and dissect it” -Richard Dawkins

Well, one might nearly give Dawkins credit *BUT* this appears mere matter of degree when it comes to the philosophers. Did Dawkins note Francis Bacon was a torturer of men? I didn’t actually look into the question but will note Dawkins musings on Descartes was certainly not informed by fishing with live bait:

Plants cannot think, and you’d have to be pretty eccentric to believe they can suffer. Plausibly the same might be true of earthworms” -Richard Dawkins

Well, Mr Dawkins, I can assure you, earthworms writhe mightily in pain, while being skewered the length of their bodies on a fish-hook, where technique requires the shank of the hook must be entirely concealed in the worm’s living flesh. And plants can’t think? That is one ‘almighty’ (Descartes God?) assumption. Let’s call Dawkins ‘Descartes lite.’ Where Descartes (and Dawkins) philosophy dies, is in the modern lab:

“The doctrine that the world is made up of objects whose existence is independent of human consciousness turns out to be in conflict with quantum mechanics and with facts established by experiment” -theoretical physicist Bernard d’Espagnat 

Last time I checked, plants & trees were still objects for purposes of science and yet are known to communicate  by land and by air … Dawkins might rather have considered how close he is to Descartes.

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Perverts of Western Philosophy

The Satires

Devolution Part 1

francis_bacon

Ever true to his name
Buggerer
Pedophile
Of Star Chamber fame
Bacon smelt game

If anyone were inclined to explore scientific ’empiricism’ to its roots, they’d find a real pig of a personality. Sir Francis’ keen sense for detecting political aroma on the breeze had been seldom overcome by his own stark odor of rancid bacon. Sycophant extraordinaire in the courts of Elizabeth I & King James (Stuart), Bacon is portrayed as a tender soul, never mind he promoted the (politically expedient) executions of Mary Queen of Scots and Robert Devereux, Earl of Essex, his ‘former’ friend, and subsequently tortured to obtain confession from Edmund Peacham. King James (yes, King James of ‘Holy Bible’ fame) instructed (after consulting Bacon on the legality of the procedure) that:

“attorney-general Bacon .. ‘put Peacham to the manacles as in your discretion you shall see occasion if you find him obstinate and perverse, and not otherwise willing or ready to tell the truth.’ Next day the torture was applied in the presence of the persons named, and he was examined ‘before torture, in torture, between tortures, and after torture’ .. Peacham is described as an old man at the time, and the inhumanity of the proceedings was revolting”

manacles-tower

Peacham was left hanging (repeatedly) as his body weight, rather slowly, dislocated his wrist, elbow and shoulder joints .. tearing muscles and tendons in the process, a method considered ‘more humane’ than obtaining essentially the same physical result via ‘The Rack.’ This is method reportedly utilized by the CIA at various ‘black site’ jails but glossed over in favor of focus on water-boarding (of Spanish Inquisition fame.) At the time, Bacon was ‘clerk’ of the ‘Star Chamber’ which had been a court resembling our own FISA court and why we had founders determined to certain legal insurance via a the Fifth Amendment in our ‘Bill of Rights’ (it would seem no longer in force.)

Bacon’s Star Chamber position allowed for his prisoner facing torture to 1) self-incriminate 2) face charge of perjury if unsatisfactory answers were provided or 3) be held in contempt if no answer was given.

A reputed pederast accused of ‘buggery’ (which he denied), as well a habit his brother, educated by the same cleric, was also reputed to be fond, prosecutions for this in the upper class seemed rare; as King James was apparently of identical persuasion. Bacon went on to write of an utopia where no scent of ‘masculine love’ was to be found; and as if to convince, he married a 14 years old girl at age 48. Her subsequent preference for other men points to a rather starved appetite, which can come as no surprise. And it is of this rancid bacon, folks, inspiration for the modern ’empirical method’ comes to us behaving as an intolerant religion; replete with ‘scientific’ dogma and its narrow rut of inquiry.

Meanwhile, at Cambridge:

“The earliest known version of The King James Bible, perhaps one of the most influential and widely read books in history, has been discovered mislabeled inside an archive at the University of Cambridge. The find is being called one of the most significant revelations in decades. It shows that writing is a process of revising, cutting, and then more rewriting. The Bible is no different in this regard, even though some conservative Christians claim it is the divine word of God himself. Perhaps God, then, is a revisionist. This find certainly seems to suggest that…”

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Perverts of Western Philosophy

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The Satires

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“You can’t convince a chimpanzee to give you a banana with the promise it will get 20 more bananas in chimpanzee heaven. It won’t do it. But humans will” -Behaviorist Yuval Noah Harari

MERGE

National Public Radio interview with Professor Bwana Ungawa; Honkus Screed Chair in Philology; Noam Chomsky School of Linguistics, Lord Greystoke Institute of Technology

NPR: So tell us Professor Ungawa, give some understanding to lay science people and reporters like myself, what is the acronym MERGE? How were you inspired to this theory?

Ungawa: Macaroni Enhanced Radio Gestation Etymology or MERGE, came to me in a meditative state when attempting digesting pasta.

NPR: Ok, so that explains the ‘macaroni enhanced’ aspect but what is ‘radio gestation etymology?

Ungawa: As Descartes noticed, we appear to be speaking freely in a way deemed appropriate to circumstances but is not caused by the circumstances. Or in lay terms, ‘Just plain BS.’ So we can produce speech over an unbounded range, constantly inventing irrelevant crap, in a way that is not determined by external stimuli and in a way that does not seem to be caused by any internal structure. And we can produce this bullshit in ways that others with similar capacities to absorb crap can comprehend and recognize as nonsense similar to their own. Well, that sort of creative aspect of comprehension is a total mystery. But that’s my language. Now questions arise for everything; bullshit visionaries in science; bullshit organization of motion or the sport of cricket particularly; bullshit audition or hearing voices in our heads, particularly our own voices that tend never to shut up; bullshit arithmetical ability mostly prone to numbers that don’t add up .. for instance Keynesian economics; bullshit comparisons to chimps fluent in sign language whose paintings are as accomplished as those by masters of modern art, any pseudo-cognitive bullshit. Bullshit happens. In language, bullshit spreads like memes. So, all of this verbiage and related crap, gestated in idle imagination, is my etymology spread via media, for instance radio.

NPR: Ok, well said professor. But let’s followup that idea; for example we have Sesame Street consigns philosophy to an entity that lives in a garbage can…

Ungawa: As per your example, each of us has somehow acquired the capacity for crap which, from the very first step, is largely mysterious. Take a child. Almost instantly and reflexively, he or she is able to embrace, out of the environment, all datum which is garbage related. How? A chimpanzee has roughly the same auditory & visual system but plainly it does not. And that is just the first step that is not understood. How did we acquire the infinite capacity to produce and immerse in rather endless, inane bullshit?

NPR: What can we say points toward this human genius for constructs? Are there any clues?

Ungawa: The most elementary combinatorial operation which finds its place somewhere in every computational process is simply an operation that takes two objects already constructed and forms a new object out of them. For instance a toilet and seat to the combined brilliance of a toilet seat. That is MERGE. This occurred to me while I had the seat up, when hurling my pasta.

NPR: So, the regurgitation of ideas is innate?

Ungawa: Whatever the lexical genitalia are, they have to be put together, and the easiest way for them to be put together is for some process to attract them, like estrus or ‘heat’ in layman’s terms. That’s MERGE. If you need more than that, then ok, there’s more – like cunnilingus – and anything more will be specific to language. For instance ‘blow-job.’

NPR: So language is as old as any sex act would be a cognitive event?

Ungawa: You got an operation that enables you to take sexual objects or concepts of similar sort, already constructed, and make highly enhanced or imaginative sexual objects out of them. That’s MERGE. As soon as you have that, you have an infinite variety of hierarchically structured expressions, such as dildos, available to you. This is why obelisks, dildos on a grand scale if you will, are expression of language through symbolism throughout civilization.

NPR: So, it’s not a question of which came first? The dildo or the language?

Ungawa: It looks as if – given the time involved – there was a sudden ‘great leap forward.’ Some small genetic modification somehow morphed us all into Maos and made this human capacity for dildoism possible. And with it came an entire range of lethal options that are available to humans within a theory of mind – a follows-orders theory of mind – so you know that some petty tyrant is trying to kill you because you don’t think what somebody else wants you to think.

NPR: A sort of ‘just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not after you’ phenomenon?

Ungawa: Well, paranoia takes place not only in a person, but also a group. We know, from physical anthropology, that this was a very small copulating group – some little group of bonobo in a corner of some playboy paradise – apparently. It was in that group, in Desmond Morris’ Tarzan, or that is to say within an anthropomorphized naked ape, some observation took place, leading to some future hominid adapted capacity of language; pointing to evolutionary event like Mao’s great leap forward. Dildoism wouldn’t have arisen without this critically important person.

NPR: Professor Bwana Ungawa, thank you for your time.

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note: this satire is based on actual interviews with Noam Chomsky whose quotes I have ‘modified’ (to say the least.)

Ron10

Satire by Ronald

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The Satires

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