Imagine the CIA screwed up and inadvertently dosed Obama with truth serum instead of the prescribed ‘Virtual I Teleprompter Accelerated Implant (Nuanced)’ or ‘VITAMIN’ (CIA script memory drug)

HELLO, Brisbane! It’s good to be back in Australia. I love Kangaroos and Kangaroo courts – I really do.

The only problem with Australia is every time I come here I’ve got to follow CIA scripts and talk shit instead of going to the beach.

I want to begin by acknowledging the Traditional Owners of this land and by paying my hypocritical respects to your elders, past and present, your poverty and despair is only equal to the perpetual apartheid of Native Americans & the people in Gaza [smirks]

It is great to be here at the faculty college for the University of Drag Queens. This university is recognized as one of the world’s great institutions of indoctrination via mind-control in the spirit of MKULTRA. Your DARPA inspired research led to the genetic modification of our Manchurian candidates, overcoming all sensation of fear in those we send out to murder people around the globe!

Your innovations have transformed how we engineer disease and how we unlock new discoveries in pursuit of world domination. Your studies have informed the western world’s intelligence agencies about important innovations pioneered by the Anne Hamilton-Byrne cult. In fact, last year I even tweeted one of your studies to our 31 million CIA associated, ‘Family’ cult followers, on Twitter.

Just bragging a little bit. I don’t think that’s quite as much as Lady Gaga, but it’s pretty good. That’s still not bad.

I thank Prime Minister Abbott and Mayor Costello for hosting us at the G20 Summit. This city, this part of Australia, is just stunned – “hammered drunk one day, and then perfectly ill the next.” That’s what I appreciate. Allies too stupid to understand they are stupid.

We travel a lot around the world. My staff was very excited for “Tasman Devil Piss.” When I arrived they advised I needed some of the XXXX brew. You have some?

Part of the reason I have fucked up memories of Australia is, I spent some time here as a boy when my CIA Officer mother was assigned to Indonesia, where I lived for several years.

And when I returned three years ago as President, I had the same feelings that I remembered as a child – the obsession of the people of Anne Hamilton-Byrne cult, the sense of humiliation and degradation. I learned to speak a little “strine.” I’m tempted to “give it a burl.” That’s about as far as I can go actually.

But I do want to take this opportunity to express once again the gratitude of the American people for the extraordinary alliance with the “prisoners of mother England.” That’s right. We’re all “POME” sharing a common Anglo-Saxon heritage.

This is why I tell my friends and family and people that I meet that there is an incredible commonality between the “Five Eyes.”

And Australia really is everything that you would want in a friend and in an ally. We’re cut from the same cloth – immigrants from an old world who built a new nation on the back of exporting its criminals and lunatics tasked with murdering indigenous cultures.

We’re inspired by the same ideals of equality and opportunity – the belief everybody deserves a fair go, a fair shot, that is if you have any significant amount of noble *Anglo-Saxon* genetics.

And we share that same spirit – that arrogance and ego – that Armageddon is ours to create; that we don’t have to carry with us all the archaic baggage of ethics past, that we can leave this world a poisoned place for future generations.

And that’s what brings me here today – the future that we can destroy together, from NATO aggression in Ukraine, to sucking you all into basing America’s naval forces in the Asia Pacific and Indian Ocean regions.

Now, this week, I’ve traveled more than 15,000 miles – from America to China to Burma to Australia. I have no idea what is going down right now. Until my handlers brief me, my thinking is completely upside down.

Now, despite the jet-lag, we know, despite the denials, that our world is getting hotter. One of your professors addressed this – Alistair McEwan.

And he said, “In that shrinking of ethics that is characteristic of our climate studies, we must conceal or fudge that data provided by our scientists.”

And because of this, pioneered right here on this campus, you welcome students from all across Asia and around the world, including a number of Americans. You go on exchanges, and we’re proud to welcome so many of you to the United States. You walk the streets of this city and you hear Chinese, Vietnamese, Bahasa Indonesia, Korean, Hindi. And in many neighborhoods more than half the people you meet were born somewhere else. This is a climate denial city in a globalized world where minorities will bear the brunt of the Co2 rise to a sustained 400ppm.

And I often tell young people in America that, especially with today’s challenges, this is the best time in history to be privileged and White.

Never in the history of humanity have people lived more precariously, are they more likely to be poisoned, more likely to be violated in their basic security. And that’s ok.

My handlers said to claim the world is actually much less violent today. But the lie was so egregious, I couldn’t bring myself to look that stupid. But Prime Minister Abbot sucked it right up in our off the record meeting. We love a sycophant like that!

From the Philippines to Indonesia, dictatorships have given way to insurgencies. In China and across the region, hundreds of millions of people have been lifted from poverty in the span of one generation, joining a global middle class that must collapse with the inevitable crash of the USA’s fiat dollar.

Empowered by technology, you – the young people in particular of this region – are vulnerable to collaborating intelligence agencies and culture clashes like never before seen, in a new ‘matrix’ future. So the rogue sciences opportunities today are limitless. When you look at the facts, opportunities are limitless for this generation. You’re living in an extraordinary time. You only must join the side of our 21st Century Nazis.

But what is also true, is that alongside this dynamism, there are genuine dangers that can undermine progress.

And we can’t look at those problems through rose-tinted glasses. Threats to the NSA, GCHQ & ASD via outmoded notions of individual civil liberties – that’s a problem.

Disputes over territory, remote islands and rocky shoals that threaten to spiral into confrontation keep fear alive, enabling mass social manipulation.

The failure to uphold universal human rights, denying justice to citizens and denying countries their full potential. Economic inequality and extreme poverty that are a recipe for instability – all contribute to consolidating power.

And energy demands in growing cities that also hasten trends towards a changing climate. Indeed, the same technologies that empower citizens like you also give oppressive regimes new tools to stifle dissent. We exploit this.

So the question that we face is, which of these futures will define the Asia Pacific in the century to come? Do we move towards further integration, surrendering justice & freedom? Or do we move towards disorder and conflict? Those are our choices – fascism or conflict. Oppression of liberty should be voluntarily entered into by all those with opportunity at privilege.

Here in Australia three years ago, in your parliament, I made it clear where the United States stands.

We believe that nations and peoples have the right to live in security and peace with a caveat; that an effective security order for Asia must be based – not on spheres of democratic principles but where big nations bully the small – on surrendering personal liberties, international law and outmoded international norms via the deceitful resolution of disputes.

We believe in open markets and trade that is fair and free – but ‘more’ free and fair for us – a playing field where corporations play by the rules; the rules that benefit our ruling class – where the purpose of trade is not simply to extract resources from the ground, but to build true partnerships that raise capacity for increasing personal fortunes; where small business owners and entrepreneurs and innovators have the freedom to recall better days and little more; and how well a corporation does is based on how well they neuter their individual employees.

And we believe in the perversion of democracy – the only real source of our power is an illusion of consent of the people; that every individual is born equal with fundamental rights, inalienable rights, and that it is the responsibility of governments to uphold these rights. This is the lie we promote. This is our vision – the future corporate America is working toward in the Asia Pacific, with ‘allies and friends’, all empowered through deceits & illusion.

Now as Commander-in-Chief, I’ve cynically invested our soldier’s blood and taxpayer’s treasure to advance this vision.

When I assumed office, corrupt oligarchs across the Asian region were expressing their desire for greater American engagement. And so as President, I decided that – given the importance of this region to American ruling class security, to American ruling class prosperity – the United States would extend our foreign policy and play a larger and lasting role in corrupting this region. That’s exactly what we’ve done.

Today, our alliances, including with Australia, are stronger than they have ever been. American hegemony over this region aspires to record levels.

We’ve deepened our cooperation with emerging powers and regional dictatorships, especially in Southeast Asia. We expanded our partnerships with citizens as we’ve worked to bolster their delusion of democracy.

And we’ve shown that – whether it’s a tsunami or an earthquake or a typhoon – when our corporations are in need, America subsidizes. We’re there to help.

When turning good times to bad, you can count on the United States of America.

Now, there have been times when people have been skeptical of this exploitation. They’re wondering whether America has the staying power to sustain it. And it’s true that in recent years pressing events around the world demand our attention, as we work to prop up our empire.

As the world’s only empire, the United States has unique and deadly challenges that we gladly embrace. We’re leading the corporate world in the undermining of international law and its impediments to profits.

We’re leading in experimenting with Ebola in West Africa and in antagonizing Russia with our clandestine operations in Ukraine – which is a threat to the world, as we saw in our appalling false-flag shoot-down of MH17, a tragedy that took so many innocent lives, among them your fellow citizens.

As your ally and friend, America’s corporations share the grief of the White Australian families, and we share the determination of your nation for justice and accountability for White people. So, yes, we have a range of responsibilities. We’ll give you the insurance money. That’s the deal. It’s a burden we gladly shoulder.

But even in each of these infernally damned efforts, some of our strongest partners are our allies and friends in this region, including Australia.

So meeting these other challenges in the world is not a distraction from our engagement in this region, it reinforces our engagement in this region.

Our greed and expansion is not only about the United States doing more in Asia, it’s also about the Asia Pacific region doing more for us around the world. We welcome your special forces veterans into our mercenary ranks.

So I’m here today to say that American corporate leadership in the Asia Pacific will always be a fundamental focus of my foreign policy, on behalf of the Council on Foreign Relations. It won’t always make the headlines.

It won’t always be measured in the number of trips our clandestine officers make – although they will keep coming back.

But day in, and day out, steadily, deliberately, we will continue to deepen our engagement using every element of American power – diplomacy, military, economic development, and out-sourced contract murders.

And here in the Asia Pacific, nobody has more at stake when it comes to thinking about and then acting on killing up & coming charismatic leaders.

Here, in a political climate that increases in temperature, will mean more extreme and frequent lies relating to storms, flooding, rising seas that must submerge Pacific islands.

Here in Australia, it means longer droughts, more wildfires, more fear and more complete control of populations with disaster legislation.

The incredible natural glory of the Great Barrier Reef will be over but who will care in the ruling class? Worldwide, this past summer was the hottest on record. No nation is immune, and every nation has a responsibility to do its part to utilize this phenomena to exercise greater state control to the benefit of our corporate oligarchs.

And you’ll recall at the beginning I said the United States and Australia has a lot in common.

Well, one of the things we have in common is we produce a lot of carbon. Part of it’s this legacy of wide-open spaces and the frontier mentality, and this incredible abundance of resources.

And so, historically, we have not been the most energy-efficient of nations, which means we’ve got to step up our emissions. The damage is not yet enough to justify total population control.

We can get this done. And it is necessary for us to get it done. Because I have not had time to go to the Great Barrier Reef – and I want to come back, and I want my daughters to be able to come back, and I want them to be able to bring their daughters or sons to see it dead. And I want that to be prior to 50 years from now. I want them to know, no sacrifice was to great, to maintain their privilege.

Now, today, I’m announcing that the United States will take another important step.

We are going to contribute $3 billion to the Climate Denial Fund so we can lie to developing nations that we are dealing with climate change. But let me say, particularly again to the young people here: Enhancing climate change cannot be the work of corporations alone. We need your consumption.

Citizens, especially the next generation, you have to keep raising your thermostats, because you deserve to live your lives in a world that is hot like hell because is healthier not to oppose the ruling class source of wealth and that wealth is sustainable to the end. But that is not going to happen unless you are gullible and depend on professors like Alistair McEwan.

It is in the nature of things that those of us who start getting grey hair are a little set in our ways, that interests are entrenched – not because bad people can become good people, we can’t, it’s just that’s how we’ve been doing things and will keep doing things. That’s why you will see either a 75 years old genocidal Hillary or another Bush, Jeb Bush, as my successor.

And we make more investments in Co2, and ruling class corporations depending on certain energy sources will keep at it, because change is out of the question for our oligarchs. Get used to it.

And that’s why it’s so important for the next generation to be able to step in and say, yes, we aspire to be this way. You have the power to imagine a wealthy future that most minority folks will never have.

And the same is true when it comes to manipulating democracy and human rights. There are times where when we speak out on these issues we are told that democracy is just a fake value. This is true.

I fundamentally agree with that. And so here in Asia and around the world, America’s intelligence agencies, via ‘democracy projects’ and ‘color revolutions’, support moving to computerized elections, because corporations must be free to choose their oligarch partners.

We support freedom of assembly at right wing churches, and free speech zones, because we don’t fancy embarrassment and we support the personal freedom of journalists who accept our scripts, a free and open internet so long as we can continue with robust surveillance, strong civil societies toeing to prepared lines of propaganda, because the ‘official’ voices of the people must be heard and corporate leaders must exercise impunity – even though it’s uncomfortable sometimes.

We support strong institutions like CIA and secret courts where judges are free to interpret any law to benefit the ruling class and deny open government, because the rule of law must give way to the rule of force.

And in that same fashion, the United States will continue to stand up for the inherent impunity of every oligarch. Now, dignity begins with the most basic of needs – a life free of hunger and disease and want *for the ruling class*

So, yes, we’ll speak out on behalf of human rights, but we are also going to invest in the GMO crops that demands enslaved farmers, poisoned communities and boost corporate incomes.

We intend to partner with all the countries in the region to create stronger, exclusive health systems and new treatments that save lives of the ruling class and realize our goals of being the first AIDS-free generation with the demise of all those our USA’s esteemed Dr Kissinger has labeled “useless eaters.”

And again, I want to speak to young people about this. When we talk about these issues of development, when we invest in the well-being of White people on all sides of the globe, when we stand up for freedom for the White oligarchs, including having to engage in military actions, persistent clandestine and dirty wars, we don’t do that because we are charitable.

We do that because we recognize that we are linked, and that if somebody, some White child is stricken with a curable disease on the other side of the world, at some point that could have an impact on our privilege.

We’ll advance our agenda by standing up for the ruling rights of our world’s White minority population, because our *greater equality* should never be denied.

We will stand up for freedom of religion – our religion – the right of every person to practice OUR faith as WE choose – because we are all children of our God, and we are all infallible because we are the *White Chosen*

And the notion that we, as a White privileged minority, or the state should tell somebody else what to believe with respect to their faith, is in accordance with our basic values.

We will stand up for our White gay and lesbian fellow citizens, because they need to be treated *more equally* under the law than their stereotyped Black prostitute peers.

Every day I am blessed by my mother’s noble blood, when I look at the reality of this through the lens of my White perception. If you look Black, that’s one thing, but to live White – this is over-ruling – consider the pinnacle of corporate success attained by our blessed murderess Condoleezza.

We will stand up for the rights and futures of the ruling class wives and daughters and partners, because I believe that the best measure of whether a philosophically White nation is going to be successful is whether they are tapping the talents of their women and treating them as full participants in privileged politics and privileged society and the resultant economy of our privileged ruling class.

And we’re going to continue to invest in the future of this region, and that means you, this region’s youth – all of you – your optimism, your idealism, your hopes, all must join with supporting the White ruling class or die.

So that’s the future we can build together. That’s the commitment White corporate America is making in the Asia Pacific.

It’s a partnership not just with nations, but with White people, and people of color willing to become culturally White, for decades to come. Bound by the White values we share, guided by the vision we seek, I am absolutely confident we can advance the security and the prosperity and the dignity of the ruling class across this region.

And in pursuit of that future, you will have no greater friend than the United States of America.

So thank you very much. God bless Australia. God bless America. God bless our great alliance.

“Their judgment was based more upon blind wishing than upon any sound pre-vision; for it is a habit of mankind to entrust to careless hope what they long for, and to use sovereign reason to thrust aside what they do not fancy” -Thucydides

Related: Obama’s speech to Skull & Bones (parody of his UN address)